Have you ever found yourself doubting God's ability to fulfill your heart's deepest desires? If so, then you are not alone. I believe that most professing Christians struggle with believing that God loves them enough to bring to pass the dreams that they hold so dear. The reason is simple: many who claim to personally know God, really don't! While they may profess otherwise, they view Him in their hearts as small, ineffective, and distant. The bottom line is this: living the abundant life is the fruit of an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ, period. Jesus said it this way, "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." (Matthew 6:33)
What do you want most? What do you seek most? What do you want from God? What do you want God to do for you? Whatever those things may be and however much you may desire them, you should be seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness.
Now, let us turn those questions around -- what is God seeking? What does He want? Consider this passage: "For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward him." (II Chronicles 16:9)
God is seeking those whose heart is perfect towards Him. Let's make that more personal -- God is seeking you, to show Himself strong to you. If you doubt the greatness and power of God, He is waiting, ready and wants to show Himself strong in your behalf. All we have to do is have a heart that is perfect toward Him, that is, to have a heart that is seeking- before anything else- His kingdom and His righteousness. We cannot do this, however, if we do not trust God.
The Scripture commands us: "ascribe ye greatness unto our God." (Deuteronomy 32:3) That is, in faith we must view God to be great. We do not have to imagine Him to be that, it is simply what He already is. Consider the following scriptures, which describe the greatness and power of God:
"The LORD hath his way in the whirlwind and in the storm, and the clouds are the dust of his feet." (Nahum 1:3)
"For, lo, he that formeth the mountains, and createth the wind, and declareth unto man what is his thought, that maketh the morning darkness, and treadeth upon the high places of the earth, The LORD, The God of hosts, is his name." (Amos 4:13)
"He divideth the sea with his power, and by his understanding he smiteth through the proud. By his spirit he hath garnished the heavens; his hand hath formed the crooked serpent. Lo, these are parts of his ways: but how little a portion is heard of him? but the thunder of his power who can understand?" (Job 26:12-14)
"Great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised; and his greatness is unsearchable. One generation shall praise thy works to another, and shall declare thy mighty acts. I will speak of the glorious honour of thy majesty, and of thy wondrous works. And men shall speak of the might of thy terrible acts: and I will declare thy greatness." (Psalm 145:3-6)
"Thy mercy, O LORD, is in the heavens; and thy faithfulness reacheth unto the clouds. Thy righteousness is like the great mountains; thy judgments are a great deep: O LORD, thou preservest man and beast." (Psalm 36:5-6)
"Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen." (Ephesians 3:20-21)
Is anything too hard for the LORD? (Genesis 18:14) No! Yet some might say, "Sure, God is strong enough, but I don't think He cares enough about me personally to fulfill my deepest desires." Is that true? Consider these scriptures:
"But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8)
"What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?" (Romans 8:31-32)
"If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?" (Matthew 7:11)
"Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, he will give it you. Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full." (John 16:23-24)
God desires greatly to give all He has to us, and God is looking for people who will receive what He has to give. So, what prevents us from receiving of God? James puts it this way: "Ye have not, because ye ask not. Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts." (James 4:2-3)
God will not fulfill the desires of the flesh for us, for those are only counterfeit desires, and they cannot truly satisfy. Thus we come to the Cross: we must give up our old nature with its counterfeit desires that cannot be fulfilled, so that we might receive the new nature with the real desires that God will fulfill. In order to receive what God has, we must give up our self, and we cannot do this on our own, for that will only result in the counterfeit of giving up outward things while holding on to our old selves in our hearts. We must do this in partnership with God, as the Holy Spirit of truth leads us into the truth which makes us free indeed.
That is what it means to seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, for the kingdom of God is within us, as Jesus said: "The kingdom of God cometh not with observation: Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, lo there! for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you." (Luke 17:20-21)
The kingdom of God is not to be found in our old nature; it must therefore be in our new nature, and it is the gift of God: "Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom." (Luke 12:32)
We must therefore submit to being given the kingdom, as Mary did, who sat at the feet of Jesus and heard His word. It's all too easy, however, to bury ourselves as Martha did in being "cumbered about with much serving." Many of our Churches today preach doing over being, a practice that runs contrary to our Lord's teachings. That is the error of attempting to make our old nature look like the new one, and it comes from not submitting to the gift of God's nature and righteousness: "For they being ignorant of God's righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God." (Romans 10:3)
To receive the gift of God's righteousness we must humble ourselves as little children: "At the same time came the disciples unto Jesus, saying, Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them, And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me." (Matthew 18:1-5)
Notice how humbling ourselves as little children is essential to receiving the kingdom of heaven in our heart. Contrary to popular thinking, walking with God and experiencing the fullness of His love does not come through being perceived as a spiritual giant or a servant in our church but through humbling ourselves as little children in the eyes of God. That must be our goal in this life! Yet when we do so, we will find that God is putting His greatness within us.
God is looking for faith on the earth; He is looking for those who will believe Him as little children, so that He might show Himself strong in their behalf. As Jesus said, "And shall not God avenge his own elect, which cry day and night unto him, though he bear long with them? I tell you that he will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?" (Luke 18:7-8)
Jesus made it abundantly clear in Luke 10:42 that if we want to experience the fullness of what God has for us, we must, as Mary did, choose "that good part." We must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him. It follows that we must then diligently seek Him! We must delight ourselves in knowing God and His word intimately and not in busying ourselves with making our old nature look good. We must give up our old self and humbly submit as little children to the gift of the kingdom of God in the new nature. We must ask of God in faith out of our new nature, nothing wavering. Only then will God give us that which we request, only then will the deepest desires of our heart be fulfilled, only then will we see the greatness and power of God, and only then will the peaceable fruit of righteousness follow us all the days of our lives. "For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. For he that in these things serveth Christ is acceptable to God, and approved of men." (Romans 14:17-18)
That is the service that is pleasing to God, which He will reward. God would much rather be believed and known and obeyed than served in appearance and not in heart! "And Samuel said, Hath the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams." (1 Samuel 15:22) "For I desired mercy, and not sacrifice; and the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings." (Hosea 6:6)
Thus, true service to God and His people can only come from a pure heart that loves and believes Him, that is, from the heart of the new nature. Serving others in any other way is a snare, and God does not count it as service to Him. God is looking for those who will serve and worship Him from the new nature and not from the counterfeit of the old. "But the hour cometh, and now is, when the true worshippers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeketh such to worship him." (John 4:23)
God is looking for you! God wants to give you great and mighty things that the natural mind cannot begin to comprehend. God wants to fill you with joy and glory and power unlike anything the natural man can begin to know. The desires of the flesh are nothing next to the real desires that God will fulfill! God is looking for you. Will you let Him give you these things, or will you count yourself out? "Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not." (Jeremiah 33:3) "But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him. But God hath revealed them unto us by his Spirit: for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God." (I Corinthians 2:9-10)
How God showed Himself strong to me
To illustrate this teaching I will tell of something remarkable that God performed in my life many years ago, the story of how I learned that God was looking for me. Much like the apostle Paul's encounter with Jesus on the road to Damascus, these miraculous happenings ingrained in me the reality that God is so big and His ways are so great that words can only begin to describe Him. The life-changing event that I am talking about took place before I had even become a member of a local church, had attended bible school classes, or even had a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. In fact, it took place while I was living a blatant life of sin.
Now you may ask how could God show Himself so miraculously to a sinner? The answer lies in this passage of scripture: "For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die. But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:6-8) In other words, the only reason that we can enjoy the privilege of knowing God personally is because -- even while we were living in sin -- He loved us so much that He sent His only Son to show us! "We love him, because he first loved us." (1 John 4:19) Not long after the story that you are about to read, I wrote a line to that effect in a song entitled "Take My Life." It goes, "Looking back on time I can plainly see, all of the things you had done for me, even though I was walking so far away from you."
In 1977, I was on tour with a secular rock band when the Holy Spirit began gently tugging on my heart. Of course, I did not know at the time that it was Him, because it took place before I had learned who He really is. (I thought the Holy Spirit was some mysterious heavenly gas.) Needless to say, my rock and roll lifestyle was diametrically opposed to the ways of God. However, in the eyes of the world it looked like I had it made. I was doing what I was passionate about -- playing music and getting the attention and praise of people everywhere we went. As far as I knew, things could not have been better. I always had plenty of money in my pocket along with an abundant supply of everything else that went with doing rock shows. Truth be told, I was having a blast! In fact, it was all down right euphoric for the first couple of years that I was touring.
Our routine went something like this: We would travel to the city where we were scheduled to perform, check in to the hotel, load our equipment into the venue, set up the equipment, do a sound check, get something to eat, get showered, change into our stage clothes, do the show, break everything down, pack it all up, load it into the truck, go back to the hotel, party until about 5:00 AM with a group of "New Friends" that we had met during the concert, sleep for about six hours, get up, get dressed, get packed, eat breakfast at lunch time, check out of the hotel, and travel to the next town where we would do it all over again.
I had been on tour for about four years when I started to sense my affections begin to change for the whole thing. The life that I had been enjoying so much was becoming drudgery. Instead of looking forward to the next gig, now it was becoming a "same ole thing only in a different city" thing. I even coined a little phrase: "Same old thing -- only the faces have changed!" The realities of road life were finally starting to wear on me, and instead of getting high for fun, I found myself getting high to break the boredom of a painfully monotonous routine. It was getting older with each passing day, and while I could tell that something was happening to me, I could not quite put my finger on what it was.
What was puzzling me was that I had been traveling with guys who had been on tour for much longer than I and they were perfectly contented. Yet I was growing increasingly unhappy and wanted to know why, because from the time when I was very young, it had been one of my goals in life to play music for a living. It was truly all I had ever wanted to do and now I felt as if I was losing everything that I had dreamed of. I was starting to see the lifestyle for what it really was -- a dead end, a fruitless and lonely road. I wanted to get out of it. So there I was continually surrounded by talented, attractive, and financially well to do people who admired me greatly, and yet I was feeling increasingly isolated. I began avoiding the nightly "New Friends" party with increasing regularity, and instead I would go back to my hotel room and watch TV -- a thing that I had not done much before.
Shortly thereafter, the band hired a new bass player named Larry Tamazo. Larry was a quiet guy and one of the most talented musicians I had ever worked with. Larry and I hit it off pretty well and started hanging out together. By this time, I was well into my rather confusing conversion, and Larry noticed that I avoided partying with the rest of the band. You will soon see that it was God who had brought Larry into the picture.
One morning around 4:00 AM I was in my hotel bed trying to make sense of everything that I was feeling. What was I supposed to do now? Was I supposed to stay with the band, go back into sales, or what? For the first time since I was a boy, I began thinking back to when I was around eight years old sitting with my Mom and Dad in church. I remembered when I had gone to the altar and gave my life to Jesus Christ. I especially remembered how great I felt for the whole week afterward. Even though I was only eight at the time, it was the best I had ever felt in my life.
Lying there in that hotel bed I suddenly knew what I had to do: I had to call out to Jesus! I was overcome with the reality that I had to confess and repent of my sins, just as I had done in Church many years before. I then slid off of my bed onto the floor, bowed my head, and asked Jesus to forgive me of everything that I had ever done that had hurt Him or anyone else. I then said amen and crawled back into bed. Immediately I felt a peace and a joy unlike any that I had experienced since I had gone to the altar as a child. The next morning, or shall I say afternoon at breakfast, I could not wait to tell Larry what had happened. He sat there and smiled. At that moment, an older waitress walked up to our table, looked straight into my eyes and said, "Son, you are a Christian aren't you!?!" As simple as that may sound, it was a huge confirmation to me that God was indeed living in my heart.
Each night after that I could not wait to get back to my room to hang out with Jesus. As the weeks passed, the Holy Spirit was making it increasingly evident that I was not where God wanted me to be. I was feeling like a total stranger to everyone that I had once been so close to. One day as I was in my room getting ready to do a show I had an interesting thought: Since music is what I do best, then why not do it for God instead of doing it for the devil? As far as I was concerned, that was a radical cutting edge idea, because I thought the church only had gospel quartets and choirs. As much as I disliked the thought of playing that style of music, I hated the thought of not serving God even more. So that night I kneeled beside my bed and prayed, "Lord, if you want me to play in a quartet or for a church choir that's what I'll pursue." Making a commitment to play with a quartet or choir meant that I had truly surrendered my life to God. My music was my Isaac and I had placed it on the altar that day.
After I had prayed, I paused for a moment and had another crazy idea. I immediately went back to God and threw in another prayer that I hoped that He would answer instead of my first request concerning my playing with a quartet or choir. Truthfully, I thought that my second or "add-on" request was so far fetched that even God Himself couldn't answer it. But I had heard somewhere that God would grant us the desires of our hearts and thought if there was ever a time to go for it all, then now was the time. Why not go ahead and ask God for my heart's deepest desire? Why settle for something that I was not passionate about? You see, I was raised listening to and admiring British bands and musicians and even dreamed of one day playing in a British rock group. Remember, all I thought the church had to offer were gospel quartets and choirs -- I was sure of it. So I stepped out on the limb and asked God for the impossible; I asked Him to allow me to tour with a Christian British rock band.
Two days later I went to my room after a show, turned on the TV, and could not believe my own eyes. The program was a late night Christian concert show called "Larry Leigh's Concert Ministries." Playing on the TV was a Christian rock band. I was stunned. I sat on the end of the bed and watched the entire show without hardly moving a muscle. I can remember thinking, "Wow, there is a whole world out there that I didn't know existed!"
As the program was ending I reached for a piece of paper and a pen to write down the contact information that was on the screen. At 3:00 in the morning I wrote Larry Leigh a letter explaining much of what I have just shared with you and asked if he knew of any Christian bands in need of an experienced drummer. I put the letter in an envelope, sealed it, put a stamp on it, and took it straight to the mail box at the hotel's front desk. Incidentally, while on the road I used my Mother's mailing address. So I called and told her that I had sent Larry Leigh a letter. She told me that she would keep her eye out for an envelope from him and would contact me if anything arrived. Two cities or six days later I got a call from Mom telling me that I had received a letter back from Larry Leigh and asked if I would like for her to read it to me. With great expectation I of course said, "Yes! Please!"
The letter read, "Dear Keith, thank you for your letter. I do not know of any Christian bands looking for a drummer at this time but I have enclosed two pages of Christian booking agencies for you to check out. Maybe one of them will help in your search for God's plan for your life." My Mother said that there were twenty four agencies on the list. I asked her to mail the list to the next city where we were scheduled to play. She said she would send a copy of it first thing the next morning.
As soon as I received the list of agencies, I knew what I had to do. (I jokingly tell people that my major in college was football and that my minor was business.) I drew up my resume, wrote a heartfelt cover letter, and took them across the street from the Hotel to a quaint little print shop. I asked for thirty matching sets of my cover letter, resume, and envelope. The clerk told me that they would be ready the next day. When I returned to the print shop the next day, I was greeted by the clerk and a very classy looking middle aged lady. The clerk introduced her to me and said that she had read my cover letter and was really blessed by it. At that, the nice lady said, "Keith, the owner of this company and I want you to know that we are not going to charge you for the work that we have done on your resumes. Your consuming desire to serve Jesus Christ has touched us all deeply and we would consider it a privilege to give these packets to you free of charge."
Wow! I must have thanked them at least twenty times, said good bye, headed straight for my hotel room, and prepared the packets for mailing. Once I had finished, I grabbed them, held them up to the heavens, and asked God to receive them and my life as my gift to Him. (Isn't it interesting how I knew to do that without being taught? The Holy Spirit is wonder-full!) I then drove to the nearest Post Office, prayed over them once again, and dropped them in the mail box. Each day and night I continually prayed that just one of them would make it into the hands of the right person.
About three weeks later, we were setting up to play in Panama City, Florida when someone from the front office shouted "Keith, you have an important phone call." When I got to the phone it was Mom. She asked me, "Are you sitting down?" I said, "Yes." She then read from a letter from a Christian booking agency located in Nashville, TN. "Keith, I received your letter, was very impressed with your credentials, and would like to talk with you as soon as possible. I think I have something that will be of great interest to you." Mom then gave me the phone number and without hesitation I called him. The agent said, "Keith, what I have to offer you is something that is completely different than anything that the Christian music industry in this country has ever had the privilege of experiencing. This is going to be huge! As a matter of fact, it is going to be a history making endeavor and I would like to invite you to audition for it.&qruot; I then asked him, rather reluctantly I might add, "What have you got?" Like Saul's encounter with Jesus, the agent's answer would change my life forever. He asked me, "Keith, how would you feel about being the drummer for the first ever British Christian rock band to come to America?" Needless to say, I was stunned! With one phone call I had witnessed God do something that I just knew was totally impossible! This was one of those stories that you only read about, and yet there I was, standing right in the middle of it!
A week later, I flew to Nashville to audition for the band. They picked me up at the airport, and we headed straight for a recording studio that was located downtown. The studio that they had rented for the audition had been closed down for several weeks, and consequently the drums were not tuned. In fact, the heads on all of the drums were so loose that they were not playable. We looked everywhere for a drum key or even a pair of pliers to tighten the heads, but could not find anything to tune them with. We then tried to play a couple of songs, but it was fruitless. No matter what I played, it sounded terrible. Feeling a bit dejected, we packed up and headed for a local restaurant. All I could think of at that point was just how much I wanted to play with those guys and how it all seemed to be falling apart right before my eyes. Why was this happening? The reason would soon reveal itself.
Over dinner, as we were talking, it was becoming increasingly evident to us that God was knitting our hearts together. Even though the audition did not go well, we were all having a great time together. When we had finished eating and headed for the van, I knew I had to do something, if I was going to salvage my dream. So I stopped the guys and asked, "Where is your bass player?" They said they were auditioning bass players, as well. I said boldly, "Brothers, this whole thing is God, I just know it is!" They asked, "What do you mean?" I went on to tell them about my friend Larry the bass player, and, with all of the boldness I could muster, I said, "You guys need to come to Florida and hear Larry and I work together as the accomplished rhythm section that we are. I guarantee you will like it!" So, while standing on that sidewalk on that cold night in Nashville, Tennessee, they each looked at one another and said, "You've got a deal!"
That night we set a date, and they came to Florida one week later and sat on the front row for our entire show. I must admit, it was pretty nerve racking to be up on that stage playing while at the same time watching these three internationally known musicians talking back and forth among themselves, obviously critiquing our every move. After the show, I introduced Larry to them, and we all sat down to hear what our new British friends thought of our performance. My heart felt as if it were going to pound out of my chest! Our new British friends looked at each other very calmly, asking which one wanted to comment first. I was sweating more at that moment more than I had been all night under the hot stage lights. The first to speak was Norman Barrett, a lead guitarist from Liverpool who had in fact played with several of the bands from England that I greatly admired. He leaned across the table and said, "I am speaking for all of us when I say, as long as we have been playing, neither of us has ever heard a better rhythm section in all of England!" He then looked at me and said, "Keith, if you will take it -- and we pray you will -- the gig is yours!" I then asked, "Larry too?" They said, "Of course!" We all shook hands, hugged one another, and it was done!
To celebrate, we all met the next day to enjoy the sugar white sand beaches of Panama City, Florida. Afterwards, we ate a late dinner, said our good-bye's, and they went back to Nashville. The band was called "The Alwyn Wall Band," a Myrrh (Word) Records group, and the time that I spent touring with those guys were some of the best times of my life. Since then I have taken the seven basic guitar chords that Alwyn had taught me and have ministered to thousands of people over the years with my own bands. I have also had the privilege of serving the body of Christ as a youth pastor, speaker, teacher, author, and in many other capacities.
No respecter of persons
Why have I told you these things? If God would do all of that for me He will most certainly do it for you! "For there is no respect of persons with God." (Romans 2:11) Yet remember this: God was free to meet me in such a miraculous way even though I was living such a sinful life, because as a babe in Christ I believed Him without reservation.
So, if you have prayed endlessly for something and have yet to see it come to pass, examine your heart and your relationship with God, repent of anything that has separated you from Him (namely, the old flesh nature), and trust in His power and desire to perform all things for you. "I will cry unto God most high; unto God that performeth all things for me." (Psalm 57:2) Seek first His kingdom and righteousness and so build a deeply personal and intimate relationship with Him, together with Him. For if we try to do that on our own, how can it be a relationship? As it is written, "And they went forth, and preached every where, the Lord working with them, and confirming the word with signs following. Amen." (Mark 16:20) In other words, signs follow those who are in an ongoing partnership with God! Please note that we are in no way laying out a formula in this message for manipulating God to meet our selfish desires, that is, the desires of the old selfish flesh nature. We are rather encouraging you to build a strong relationship between yourself and Him! "Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." (Matthew 6:31-33)
A partnership with God is built when we solely seek Him- not signs, not wonders, nor anything else! True signs and wonders come only as a result of our intimate relationship with Him! "And they went forth, and preached every where, the Lord working with them, and confirming the word with signs following." (Mark 16:20) If we abide in Him, then He will abide in us, with all of the power and wonder and joy and glory He brings! Here's a little something to think about, If the atheist does not believe in "God", then what would that make a professing Christian who does not believe or walk "in God"? Selah.
If you have ever doubted God's ability to do the impossible in your life, we pray that this testimony and brief exhortation will serve to dispel whatever doubt that you may have in your heart, while at the same time fanning the flame of passion in your life to love, believe, and obey God wholeheartedly. If you will do this, your life will never be the same. I guarantee it!